Author: Vivian Martha

Simple, passionate about the things of God, always eager to learn and love reading.

Not everything is my fault

Vivian Martha2 Comments

I have always believed in effort and personal responsibility. Growing up, I was taught that we have a role to play in this universe. We should not just sit around and wait for God to do everything for us. So, I worked hard at everything I was given; convinced I was the master of my destiny. As the saying goes, “you reap what you sow”. Yet, as I journey through life, I have realized that effort does not always guarantee the desired results. Sometimes the harvest looks nothing like what you sowed.

Jesus taught his disciples a parable about a farmer in Mathew 13:24-29. In the parable he explained that a farmer sowed seeds on his farm but, in the night while men slept, an enemy came and sowed tares (weeds). When the crops began to grow the workers noticed that there were weeds among them and they asked, “Did we not sow good seeds? Where then are the tares from?” The farmer replied “this was the work of the enemy.”

This parable teaches us that we are not the only ones sowing seeds. There is an enemy waiting for the night to fall and then he sows his bad seed. We can not blame the workers for sleeping because it is natural for men to rest after a long day at work. Yet the enemy takes advantage of this moment. And it was only after the crops had grown that the famer realized there was a product he never sowed!

This lesson resonates deeply with life and with Christian living. We usually blame ourselves when things go wrong, asking, “What did I do wrong?” or “What did I miss?” But not every failure or setback is our fault. Sometimes, despite our best efforts, an unseen adversary works against us.

We always talk about how Judas betrayed Jesus and how he was such a bad person. However, Judas spent three years helping Jesus in His ministry. His love for money was a flaw, but he might have continued as a disciple. The trouble came one night, as Luke tells us “Then Satan entered Judas, called Iscariot, one of the Twelve (Luke 22:3)“. It was only after the devil came that Judas mastered the courage to go to the Pharisees and betray Jesus. The enemy had sowed a bad seed.

I am learning that not everything is my fault. I understand that there are battles beyond my control—forces at work that are not flesh and blood but spiritual in nature. Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

In the past each time things did not work out as I hoped and planned, I blamed myself. “There is something I did not do, something I missed, something I did wrong” – often carrying the guilt of not being good enough or not doing enough. But now I know there are many things that had nothing to do with my efforts, but everything to do with the enemy’s schemes.

Certain theology had taught me not to give the devil any attention. That “All that matters is what I do!” However, I’ve learnt that a strong will and determination alone are not enough because the enemy, a master of the unseen world, stops somewhere and resists. It is not about whether I give him attention or not, because on his part he is – working in the shadows – sowing bad seed to frustrate and make it look like I never sowed anything good to begin with.

Therefore, rather than be hard on myself all the time, I have learnt to be gracious with myself and to forgive myself. I think this is why there are many things God – in his mercy and wisdom – does not even condemn us for; because he knows an enemy came in.

So, I have learnt to pick myself up from the frustration and place I was at – where I was blaming myself for everything wrong – and realize that I have an adversary. The answer is not in self guilt but in resisting the devil. James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Even Jesus taught his disciples in the lord’s prayer “deliver us from evil” (Matthew 6:9-13).

The answer is in prayer: that even though we cannot stop the enemy from sowing seeds, we can pray that our seed survives – and bears good fruit (Matthew 13:8), that endures (John 15:16). And no matter how much he tries, in the end we stand victorious, because we have God on our side (1 John 4:4).

The journey of faith

Vivian Martha3 Comments

What I’ve learnt about faith over the years is that it sometimes portrays you as a liar or a fool who is denying reality. There are times where it feels like you are lying to yourself and to the world. We often say, “I want God to speak”, but, in my experience, when God speaks, the things he says are so far removed from the reality that you are living in. It’s understandable that people constantly ask themselves, “Did I hear correctly?”

How does this even make sense? Or, as we say these days, “make it make sense”. How do you get your mind to perceive the mysteries God is revealing? How do you explain to people the things that God is telling you? As one of our gospel artists, Bugembe, sang years ago, “Ebintu bye olumu bibuzabuza”. For those who don’t understand Luganda, the translation is “His things are sometimes confusing”.

I do not even know why I am surprised because, in describing faith, Jesus taught that even if it is as small as a mustard seed (arguably the smallest seed in the world), you can tell a mountain to move, and it can move and throw itself in the sea (Matthew 17:20). A mountain is something that doesn’t move, so why would Jesus use such an analogy? This illustrates that there are many aspects of faith that defy explanation.

I have seen in life that God can speak to a nation or a church, but many times he speaks to you alone, even in a sea of people. This is what makes it the hardest. If I’m in a church, why doesn’t God simply instruct the pastor to share the message with everyone present? Instead, he speaks to a heart. And now you have to explain to others what you have personally heard and interestingly, there is no way to verify what you are saying! When Saul encountered Jesus on the road to Damascus, the men accompanying him heard a voice but did not see because he revealed himself to Saul alone! Saul had to explain to the men who were with him that he had met Jesus, the one he was persecuting (Acts 9:1-9).

I think of Joseph. How could Joseph, in prison, explain to his fellow inmates that he once had a dream in which the sun and moon were bowing to him? Or even assert that he believed that dream – when he found himself, a slave serving an indefinite prison sentence (Genesis 39)? I think of David, whom Samuel anointed to be king but Israel already had a king and princes who were ready to take the throne. No wonder Samuel was afraid to go. And remember, David did not even have the stature of a king. His family limited his potential to only caring for sheep (1 Samuel 16).

I think of Mary telling Joseph she was expecting a child, but she was still a virgin! If she were in today’s generation, she would justify the statement “fear women”. How would she explain that she, out of all women, would give birth to Jesus? Shouldn’t Jesus have chosen a wealthier, more educated, or influential family? Afterall, nothing good came out of Nazareth in that time (Luke 1:26-38). And could it be that Mary, not being able to find the words to explain the happenings in her life, chose instead to keep and ponder those things in her heart (Luke 2:19)?

I think of God telling Moses to lead people out of Egypt, and yet the path he led him through ended in a sea! We expect that if he says move, there should be a path of dry land or even a mountain because they could climb that. But a body of water? I wonder what Moses was thinking when he told the people that God had sent him to deliver them, only to find themselves facing a sea (Exodus 14)! And I think of God telling Peter to cast his nets again, in the deep waters at that – and catch fish – but this man had tried all night and failed. What had changed (Luke 5:4-11)?

These and many other Bible characters demonstrate that the fathers of faith experienced moments that could have been perceived as dishonest. And I know we are not the first to face challenging situations, where everything else does not work and the only thing left is faith. David captured it well “I had fainted if I had not believed to see the goodness of God in the land of the living (Psalms 27:13)“. These witnesses remind us that faith may not always make sense, yet it remains effective. They believed God even though every time he spoke, there was nothing that seemed favorable about it. He only asked them to believe, and they heeded to him – in simple faith (Hebrews 11).

I have learnt that when God speaks, he doesn’t always provide all the details; in fact, he never does. Yet faith requires you to take him at his word. He did not tell David that it would take him more than10 years to become king, nor did he tell Joseph that he would face betrayal, slavery and prison before realizing his dream.

However, the best part about the Bible is that we know how the story ends: in one day, Joseph moved from a prisoner to a governor; he was the father of Pharaoh; Mary gave birth to the savior of the world; God split the Red Sea for Moses; and David became king. Therefore, we can confidently say “It will end in praise!” It may not make sense for us now because, as the Bible says, we see in part, and as it turns out, we always see the smallest part. God sees all, so faith in the end wins; it produces results (1 Corinthians 13:9-12).

I am discovering that the journey of faith is a challenging one; it necessitates me to step outside of my comfort zone and maintain faith even in the face of overwhelming evidence that it won’t happen. I’ve learned to cling to His word – as the surest evidence – that everything will indeed happen as he said (Hebrews 11:1, Matthew 28:6).

There are times you fail at something and God says try it again. You prayed for someone, but they didn’t heal; you preached, but people didn’t convert; you tried a job, but it didn’t work out, and God says, “Try again”. What guarantees that this time will be different when nothing has changed? The only guarantee you will get is that God can be trusted – so you put your faith in him. The just shall live by faith – is repeated 3 times in the Bible – for emphasis (Romans 1:17,Galatians 3:11,Hebrews 10:38).

Hebrews 11:1-2 “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. For by it the elders obtained a good testimony.”

God’s Promises

Vivian Martha2 Comments

Campaigning season was one of my favorite times at the university. I was always looking forward to the 2 or 3 weeks of intense campaigning. The noise, the rallies, the posters, the sweet bribes, and the occasional ice cream always made me happy. My favorite thing was listening to the candidates make their speeches and tell us about Makerere University’s problems and what they were proposing to do to fix them.

Whether it was at a campaign rally or one-on-one, I was a good listener. I attentively listened to a candidate who assured students that they would no longer be concerned about missing marks, another who addressed the safety of girls in the university. I always found it interesting when they made over-the-top claims, but they were bold and loud – almost believable. For example those who pledged to collaborate with as many alumni as possible to repair the damaged block C of Lumumba Hall. We all knew that was not happening soon but as I said they are believable in the heat of the moment.

Watching them for years helped me understand that one thing human beings love to do is make promises. Politicians, of course, make them more than anyone else because what stands between them and the coveted seat is the number of promises they make. 

I have spent many years observing men, and I am aware that many of them share this common characteristic. A man promises the woman he loves heaven on earth and promises to forsake all others. The woman, in turn, promises to submit and devote herself to him completely. When C.E.O.’s take the job, they promise to achieve the highest turnover the company has ever seen under their leadership, and the executive directors guarantee that no matter how high the target is, they will surpass it with hard work and determination. The parent promises the child that they will receive whatever they desire. And I do not want to get started with the businessmen and the promises they make to get us to buy from them instead of their competitors.

Some of these people make these promises with the intention of fulfilling them; they come from a good heart. Others, fully aware that they will never deliver on their promises, do so because they know it’s what their audience wants to hear. Whatever the case, many times people do not deliver on the promises they have made. As certain as it is that humans make promises, it is also certain that most promises unfortunately go unfulfilled. Sometimes it is beyond our human capacity to fulfil the promise, and no matter how hard someone tries, it is not enough. 

People often carry broken hearts and feel disappointed when someone they trusted to keep a promise fails to do so. As a result, people have learned to safeguard their hearts by not trusting those who make promises and rightly so; after all many in the past have made promises but failed to fulfil them.

Regrettably, the disappointment and frustration we have experienced with people affects our view of God. Somehow, we think that even God will disappoint us and fail to fulfil his promises. Maybe God will be like most of our politicians: excite us for a season, especially when we are in church, and then, in the end, not deliver. Many of us will not openly admit it maybe for fear of being judged as a faithless Christian but if we did open heart surgeries to see what is in the hearts of men, we would find the struggle men have and the question “Can God be trusted to keep his promises?” lingering somewhere.

So I started to search scripture looking for what it had to say about promises. It had quite alot to say; I will share a few of those verses. I read some verses from Joshua. Joshua 21:45 tells us, “Not one of all the Lord’s good promises to Israel failed; everyone was fulfilled”. Joshua 23:14 asserts this further, “Now I am about to go the way of all the earth. You know with all your heart and soul that not one of all the good promises the Lord your God gave you has failed”.

Joshua was about to die when he spoke these words to his people. They say to pay attention to the last words of a dying man. It was important to remind the Israelites of the nature of God; he is a promise-keeping God. Twice, Joshua tells the people that none of the promises God made failed to come to pass. Every promise he made, he fulfilled. This is God’s nature, and no one should be more sure of this than the children of God.

The best part is that Joshua testified that he fulfilled all, not just some, of his promises. Sometimes we ask God that “kale at least do ko for me this one”. You want at least one thing in your life to be working. But if he is God, he will not stop at one, but at everything that he promised. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). If he kept his promises to the Israelites, surely he has not changed, therefore we have this confidence that he will do the same for us.

“Sovereign Lord, as you have promised, you may now dismiss your servant in peace. For my eyes have seen your salvation” – Simeon attested in Luke 2:28–29. We do not know when this promise was given to Simeon but he patiently waited on God for it to come to pass. One day, stirred by the Spirit of God, he went to the temple and saw Jesus. God kept his promise to this old man. Simeon testified the same thing as Joshua had testified many years ago; God keeps his promises. Judith Babirye put it well in her song “Mukama Talimba”.

God isn’t in the business of breaking hearts; he’s in the business of mending them. Many things limit men, but they do not limit God. He reassures us of this in Matthew 19:26 –  Jesus looked at them and said, “With man, this is impossible, but with God, all things are possible”. He can fulfil all his promises. Therefore, it is up to us to search the Bible to see everything he has promised and believe him to fulfil it.

Even when life looks like it is so far from what God promised, the apostle Paul taught us something important in  2 Corinthians 4:18 – So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. God’s promises for us are eternal and everlasting, from generation to generation. One thing I have learnt in my Christian journey is that no matter what happens and no matter how long it takes, in the end God will keep his promises to us.

One day…

Vivian Martha6 Comments

I remember meeting this young man years ago, while out on a school outreach; he was receptive when we approached him so we carried on with our message. After reading numerous passages from the Bible, we posed the question, “Do you want to give your life to Christ?”. He did not answer immediately, visibly thinking deeply about the question. When he finally replied, he said, “One day I will, but not today.” And despite our great efforts he could not be persuaded otherwise. I don’t know what happened to that young man because we were in a far-off region, but his response stuck with me.

When we were in school, the educational system always expected us to know what we wanted to be in the future. As early as primary school, we started singing songs about the wonderful future that education would surely bring.
“When I grow up, I want to become a doctor
 I work very hard, I don’t relax
If I relax, everything will relax,”, went the lyrics of a popular song at my primary school.

Every parent desired to hear about our goals for the future. They wanted to hear us say we would be doctors, lawyers, engineers. Dreams changed over time when we entered secondary school and were exposed to more challenging topics and subjects. Our syllabus in biology and chemistry told us that not everyone could become a doctor. But we still managed to navigate and reimagine what else we could become.

I’ve been raised with such a strong system of looking forward and striving for a bright future that, even as an adult, I find myself talking about my future goals all the time and always imagining what a glorious future I will have. I comfort myself on bad days by telling myself, “I will be great one day. I’ll accomplish big things one day”.

When this thought most recently crossed my mind, instead of relishing in it, for the first time I had to ask myself, “What about today? What do I do?” It caused me to consider the number of things I have put off doing because I believed I would get around to them at some point in the future. Now I am forced to ask; when will that moment arrive, and why can’t those things be done right now? While it is true that certain tasks are limited to the future – owing to time and resource constraints, many tasks can be accomplished today.

The lyrics of a song by American gospel singer TobyMac say, “If you have to start somewhere, why not here? If you have to start sometime, why not now?” Those were, in my opinion, really profound words. And I realized I should pray to God to know what to do in the here and now while I wait for God to show me what my future self will hold. Give us this day our daily bread, says Matthew 6:11. Jesus instructed us to ask the Father for our today when we pray.

I shall preach the gospel one day. So why not preach it today, one could ask? I plan to study my bible cover to cover one day. I plan to write a book one day. Why not get going right now? I’ll launch my business eventually; I’ll apply for the job eventually. I’ll ask that girl out one day; I will join church ministry; I will do charity, I will read that book, I will go back to school. The list of things we push to the future are endless.

Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. We have a lot of work to accomplish tomorrow, but we also have a lot to do today. Have you completed everything that needs to be done today? Above all, are you aware of what needs to be done today? Are you aware of the things you can achieve today?

The future always looks promising, like it holds all the answers and all the solutions. God has put somethings in the future and you have to wait on him for them. But he has also put some things in our today and we owe it to ourselves to know what they are and start working on them.

You do not need a new year to do a cover to cover sweep of your bible, you do not always need all the many qualifications and experience you think you need to apply for a job; you can do it today. You do not have to wait for church to announce a fasting period; you can start your own today. There are many things we are qualified to do today. All we need is the bravery to move forward.

“One day at a time sweet Jesus
That’s all I’m asking of You
Just give me the strength
To do everyday what I have to do
Yesterday’s gone, Sweet Jesus
And tomorrow may never be mine
Lord help me today, show me the way
One day at a time.”

One Day At Time by Lynda Randle

The Waiting Room – While I wait

Vivian Martha5 Comments

Waiting is hard! Anyone who has had to wait on the Lord for anything will testify to this. It will test every confession of faith, trust, and hope in God you have ever professed. It is even more challenging when other seemingly good options are available, but you must still wait on God’s will and His perfect timing.

Sarah illustrated this very well in the book of Genesis in the Old Testament. She waited so many years for a promised son and eventually got tired. One day, an idea came to mind; she went to her husband, Abraham, and offered a solution for their barrenness. Instead of waiting indefinitely with no assurance, her maid Hagar would bring the promise of a son to fulfilment. “Maybe I can have children through her” (Genesis 16:2b), she said. Abraham, perhaps tired of the wait as well, listened to his wife, accepted the proposal, and went into Hagar; and thus, Ishmael was born. Genesis 16:3 “So he went into Hagar, and she conceived.” However, in God’s kingdom, the child recognised as the promised son was Isaac, who came after the wait.

It has been many years since Abraham and Sarah’s story; however, I believe there will always be someone waiting on the Lord in every generation. Waiting for different reasons: a job, a business, a breakthrough, healing, marriage, a child, ministry, the voice of God – the list is endless.

In my earlier post, I wrote about three things that cause delay: ignorance, the devil, and God. In this post, I focus on the last part: waiting on God. This is for those waiting on the lord. I will list three things we should do while we wait on the Lord.

1. Do not lose your joy

The thing about a promise is that when it is first given, there is excitement, awe, and thanksgiving. But over time, the promise becomes a painful memory as days turn into months and months into years – a reason to question your sanity and whether it was God whom you heard speaking. And life is cruel. It will constantly demand results, and at some point, those doing well will deem you a failure. All this can cause you to be angry and disappointed in God, leading to a loss of joy. We always try to justify it; stating the reasons for our lack of joy and the bitterness that follows afterwards. But remember that whatever the devil can steal, he will steal, even if it is your joy.

However, in this kingdom, joy is strength. The joy of the Lord is your strength” (Nehemiah 8:10). Joy is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. When the Spirit of God gives it, it is independent of your current circumstances. In Matthew, Jesus teaches us something. Matthew 6:31-32 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. While waiting, we can forget that God hears, knows, or He often responds in grand style, but God understands more than we think he does, and he is very determined to make glory come from our lives. The Bible calls him Faithful. Even with Ishmael already born, God still sent Isaac, the son of the promise. Therefore, while I wait, I do not lose my joy.

2. Remain in prayer

Luke 18:1 And He spoke a parable unto them to this end that men ought always to pray and not to faint. Prayer is a kingdom principle; there is no way around it. The German theologian and greatest force in the Protestant movement in Europe Martin Luther said, “I have so much to do that I shall spend the first three hours in prayer.” The results may not come after the first time that you say amen, but you press forward in prayer.

Sometimes there is an instruction to follow before the manifestation of what you have prayed for. You will receive this instruction only in the place of prayer. Notice the prophets in the Old Testament. The word of the Lord often came with instructions. Prayer is not just to talk to God but to hear what he has to say and listen for instruction.

Jeremiah 2:1-2 Moreover, the word of the Lord came to me, saying, “Go and cry in the hearing of Jerusalem, saying, “Thus says the Lord.”…

Isaiah 7:3 Then the Lord said to Isaiah, “Go out now to meet Ahaz, you and Shear-Jashub, your son, at the end of the aqueduct from the upper pool, on the highway to the Fuller’s Field.”

Ezekiel 3:1-2 Moreover, He said to me, “Son of man, eat what you find; eat this scroll, and go speak to the house of Israel.” So I opened my mouth, and He caused me to eat that scroll.

1 Kings 19:15 Then the Lord said to him: “Go, return on your way to the Wilderness of Damascus; and when you arrive, anoint Hazel as king over Syria.

All the verses above illustrate an instruction from the Lord for the prophets to carry on. Remember we are co-labourer’s with Christ therefore, we must know what role we play in that relationship. 1 Corinthians 3:9 For we are co-workers in God’s service; you are God’s field, God’s building. Prayer will guide us in the way to go. The gospel of Luke introduces a woman very briefly but her story carries an important message. Anna was a prophetess (Luke 2:36-38) who perceived that the savior would come in her time. While she waited for that appointed time, she dedicated her life to fasting and praying in the temple. Therefore, while I wait, I will pray.

3. Praise is comely

I have always wondered why every church service starts with praise and worship. I learnt that it is not just for singing and dancing; it is done in honour of our God. It is an acknowledgement of the one from whom all blessings flow. Sometimes he will place a song on your heart that will minister to you more than any other song in that season. It could be an old song or a new one that God is writing through you. While marching around the walls of Jericho, it was not prayer but blowing the trumpets and a loud shout that brought the wall of Jericho down. There is power in praise.

Consider David, the man God testifies about and says was a man after his own heart. Acts 13:22 And when He had removed him, He raised for them David as king, to whom also He gave testimony and said, ‘I have found David the son of Jesse, a man after My own heart, who will do all My will. One of his greatest secrets was praise. In the cave of Adullam, when he was hiding from King Saul, waiting for the appointed time to be king, he praised. When he was repenting from the sin of killing an innocent man and taking his wife, he praised. When his son Absalom overthrew him and took over the kingdom and he was in great distress, he raised a psalm of praise to the Lord. Therefore, while I wait, I will praise.

My heartfelt prayer is that we will not grow weary in the season of waiting on the Lord, but we shall have joy unspeakable, we shall remain in prayer and our lips shall be full of praise. For he has promised in Isaiah 40:31 that those who wait on the Lord. Shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Selah

The Waiting Room – Why delay happens

Vivian Martha5 Comments

When I was studying the English language in high school, we had a section called “composition writing”. Adding similes and proverbs while writing our compositions always gave us additional marks. I managed to collect a few proverbs which I kept writing in every exam. One of them was, “Good things come to those who wait.” I was reminded of this proverb while writing about the waiting room. It is an encouragement to know that waiting is not always in vain. Good things come to those who wait.

However, life does not always allow us to think of the good things at the end, but rather the immediate negative feelings while we wait. We often develop feelings of defeat and failure, especially when others advance past us and seem to have everything going for them. In the first part of this series, I talked about the awesome fact that the Bible is no stranger to delay and that waiting is a posture which every child of God, including our ancient forefathers, has to take in one way or another. In this write-up, I explore three reasons why we experience delay so that we may each identify the root cause of delay in our lives and know how we can deal with such seasons.

Delay due to ignorance

When delay happens, we often want to play the victim, blaming others for our situation, or blaming forces above and beyond our control. However, there are times when no force is available and no enemy stands in the way but ourselves.

Hosea 4:6: “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge; because you have rejected knowledge, I reject you from being a priest to me.” “Moreover, since you have forgotten the law of your God, I also will forget your children.”

Hosea teaches that we pay a high price due to our ignorance. God rejected the Israelites as priests due to their lack of knowledge. The effects of such a decision are catastrophic. When the Lord, who opens doors and shuts them, rejects you, there is a reason for concern. The question then is, what knowledge did these people lack which led to their destruction? Let’s talk about three of these:

Lack of knowledge of the systems and workings of God: God does not operate randomly; he is a God of order. 1 Corinthians 14:33 “For God is not a God of disorder but of peace—as in all the congregations of the Lord’s people”. God will only entrust us with tasks which we are equipped to handle and the first part of being equipped is having the knowledge and understanding of the systems and workings of God.

Lack of knowledge of oneself and one’s purpose: Men spend years pursuing things God never called them to do and, in the process, delay what God has called them to do and the blessing and progression which comes with it. Moses spent years as a prince in Egypt and then as a fugitive tending to his in-law’s sheep; all the while not knowing that God had called him to lead the Israelites out of a life of slavery in the hands of the Egyptians.

Lack of knowledge and understanding of the world system and how it works: King Solomon, considered the wisest man in the Bible, illustrated this point well. He understood how the world worked, why people were poor, how to build cities, and what made a man prosper. Follow closely and you will find the same things taught today by motivational speakers. The point is that the principles do not change, and failure to learn them causes delay. If all we do is to wait for the good things at the end and never gain understanding, the waiting room will only be prolonged. The solution is not to wait but to take action by gaining wisdom and understanding.

Delay due to satanic influences

As New Testament believers, sometimes we are quick to rule out this option; however, sometimes, delay is backed by hell. The devil and his cohorts stand in the way and make it difficult for any breakthrough to happen for the children of God. Revelations 12:13 “Now, when the dragon saw that he had been cast to the earth, he persecuted the woman who gave birth to the male child.” The devil was cast out into the world, and he immediately started persecuting men. Even when Jesus died for our sins on the cross and redeemed man, Satan did not leave the earth. He is still as determined as before to destroy man, and delay is one of the tools he uses. The devil knows he cannot stop the blessings of God from reaching us, but he can at least delay them. 

So why does he cause delay and fight to ensure that things take a long time? It is because he knows delay causes weariness (Proverbs 13:12). And once men are tired, they will make all sorts of wrong decisions; they will curse God, and in the worst-case scenario, they will turn away from the faith. Even the best can make mistakes when they are delayed. In the parable of the ten virgins, the groom delayed, and both the wise and the foolish slept. If he can delay you long enough, certain options that were never acceptable become considerable. When an illness takes too long and costs too much money, a person may be able to sign deals they never thought they could, or the village healer can become an option!

Delay due to the purposes of God

Colossians 1:17 “He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.” The Bible explains that everything holds together in God. Waiting is also included in that list. Sometimes God allows the process to be slower than our expectation. Fortunately or unfortunately, this is not delay which we can pray away. It is in God’s good and merciful design that some things go at a slow pace; at least slower than our expectations. All you have to do is trust that the process will be worth it. Some things could not have come if there was no waiting process. Some things are only possible because of the process. God is not punishing you but rather preparing you. Why does God cause us to wait? It is because he is preparing us for something big, and the process is designed to make us ready for the blessing (Romans 5:1-6). 

David in the Old Testament illustrates this point best: he was chosen by Prophet Samuel and anointed to be king, but it took him 13 years to get to the throne while it took Saul only a few days. The journey through the wilderness and the harsh conditions he went through prepared him to be the king that Israel needed. So much depended on him, and God had to take extra care to ensure that the process was worth it. In the end, when Jesus comes from among all the kings, it is David that he identifies with because he was the one whom he prepared to take the throne. 

I know that when we are going through periods of delay, the last thing we want to hear is “wait”. We want to hear that a breakthrough is coming now because it is never easy to wait. However, the good news is that God’s waiting room was designed to keep us only for a short time. We can never be there even a second longer than God has deemed necessary.

You will not wait forever. For at the right time, the door will open. However, in the meantime, understand that God is molding something great, and you can only appreciate it once the process is complete.

Shalom

The Waiting Room – The reality of delay

Vivian Martha4 Comments

We live in a time where everything happens fast. The 21st century is a period of speed; the invention of the 5G network, an upgrade from the 4G, which was working perfectly, should be evidence of that. Every new idea and invention will only be supported if it comes with the advantage of speed. The new telecom company promises faster internet speeds; the new bank promises shorter times in the queue and faster money transfers.

The system we live in operates on time; we go to school at a particular time, finish by a certain age, and get our first job at a certain age. Therefore, when we are young, we assume that our lives will automatically move at the same speed as or even faster than we have witnessed growing up. We use the current trend as the yardstick to measure what should happen and when.

However, I am now old enough to know that life does not always work out as planned. We all move at a different pace from what is dictated by our systems and culture. At some point, we move slower and experience delays in one or many areas. I have seen many things under the sun that have made me realize that delay is, in fact, real.

I have seen brilliant people – the ones everyone in the neighbourhood said had a bright future – fail to finish school for one reason or another. I have seen people stay for many years at a job they said was a starter job and intended to work for only two years while they looked for better opportunities. Six years later, the better opportunities never came. I have seen a university graduate who was told from a young age that education was the key to success sit in despair in their parent’s home four years after graduation with no job.

I have seen the good girl clock 35 before marriage. Everyone says she will make a good wife one day, but that day drags on and never seems to come. I have seen the most hard-working person take ten years at one level; every promotion has a condition they cannot meet. I have seen a married couple celebrate their firstborn’s 16th birthday in a rented house with three rooms. I have also seen a pastor have a congregation of 50 people even after 20 years in ministry. It can happen to prayer warriors and to lukewarm Christians.

I am no stranger to delay, and even though many days I put up a strong face, some days, waves of discouragement come. The questions start; why is life not moving, or if it is moving, why is it so slow? Why have I failed to leave the waiting room? Is there hope for me, or should I accept my fate and wait to experience certain things in heaven?

I remember a sermon from high school many years ago from a vibrant man of God. Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” The word of the Lord through Jeremiah was clear: God has plans for us, and they are good, and yet sometimes it feels like a paradox, a statement that mocks us when we do not see these promises; at least not in the time frame we wish them to be.

Was delay only experienced in the 21st century, or did men of old experience the same, and if they did, how did they leave the waiting room?

When I began to intentionally study the subject of delay from the Old Testament to the New Testament, I realized something. The men of old, the ones whose stories we know and love, went through periods of uncertainty, delay, trusting in God, and hoping against all hope. 

Abraham the father of believers had to wait 25 years, even after the promise of a son. Jacob had to wait for more than 20 years for the blessing and inheritance, even after seeing a stairway to heaven at Bethel, where God promised a blessing to the whole earth through him. Joseph dreamt, he was a leader at the age of 17, and he became governor at 30. David was anointed king as a teenager and waited for a decade before he sat on the throne. Lazarus, the one Jesus loved, fell sick and died, and for four days he was in the grave.

The stories are many, but one thing is clear; the Bible is no stranger to delay, and we are not the first to feel we have waited so long and have grown weary of the waiting room. Therefore, there must be a reason why delays happen. Most importantly, there should be a way out, and we should know what to do during such seasons of our lives. This blog series will address some of these aspects so that on a whole we become good “waiters” in the Kingdom of God.

The Story I will tell

Vivian Martha5 Comments

Everyone who walks with God has a story to tell. The stories may be different but one thing remains true – the experience you get along the journey leaves you with something to tell. Growing up, I thought my story would start on a high note and end like a fairy tale. It is what the preachers said on Sunday or at least the only parts I picked out. ‘Everything will be okay,’ they reiterated to our young and eager souls, a perfect way to keep us on our toes – waiting for tomorrow to come; excited about the beauty it concealed. Then life happened and storms of life hit so hard that they left me wondering if something was wrong with me or with my Faith. My story hit a pause button and I needed more than anything else to find out how other people were fairing – and for those who had made it, how they had avoided these storms and lived to tell their beautiful stories.

Therefore, I picked up my bible and began to go through the pages. And I realised it was full of people going through different stages of life, but they all had one common attribute: This grit like – bordering stubborn – Faith in God. Men like Job who were bold enough to tell God, ‘Kill me if you want, but I am not going anywhere [paraphrase]’. At the end of their lives, each learnt something about God and testified on the same thing: His never-ending Faithfulness to His word and His people. There is a plethora of men and women to write about but today I picked out three of them – all women (we will definitely look at the men another time!). Meet Hagar, Hannah, and the woman with the bleeding disease.

Hagar. We meet her in Genesis and in her story; she starts out as a slave to Abraham and Sarah. When Sarah and Abraham failed to have a child, they resorted to bringing her on board so she could bear a child for them. When she became pregnant, she started to forget her status and overlook her mistress. Sarah would not take it and started to treat her harshly. Unable to endure the harsh treatment, Hagar ran away. She ran into the desert alone and pregnant, unsure of the way to her home. After a long walk and with a lot of despair she rested near a well where an Angel found her. He asked her to go back and submit to Sarah, her mistress and he gave her the assurance that all would be well for her and the son that she would bear, even going as far as telling her that her son would have a great inheritance. What stands out for me is her response; ‘I have now seen the one who sees me (Genesis 16:13)‘; and she gave God a name ‘You are the God who sees‘. Hagar learnt on that day, after years of feeling unseen and unvalued, that God also saw her. There was a God who did not just see her master and mistress, but a God who saw slaves as well! So if Hagar could write her story, it would go: There is a God who sees me even when men do not see me.

Hannah. We meet Hannah in the book of Samuel. She starts out as a barren woman mocked by her co-wife for something that was not even her fault. Her predicament was the same year in and year out, and Hannah was always in tears. One day when she went with her husband to Shiloh to worship, she prayed so fervently that the priest Eli thought she was drunk. However, this time something different happened. Heaven answered! She bore a son, Samuel, who went on to become the voice of God in Israel for as long as he lived. When Hannah came to give thanks, she prayed, ‘He lifts the poor from the dust and lifts the beggar from the ash heap and sets them among princes and makes them inherit the throne of Glory (1 Samuel 2:8)‘. Hannah saw God take a despised barren woman and crown her with His Goodness. So if Hannah could write her story, it would go: There is a God who lifts us up, takes away the shame and pain, and fills us with laughter.

The woman with the bleeding disease. Her story is found in the gospel of Matthew, Mark and Luke. None of them is kind enough to tell us her name. All they say is that she had a bleeding disease for 12 years. One day she got the news that Jesus was coming to town and she joined the crowd coming to see him. Her Faith propelled her to touch Jesus’ cloak and when she did, she was healed immediately. Jesus then turned around and asked, ‘Who touched me?’. After a short search, she came forward and he told her; ‘Daughter, your Faith has made you well. Go in peace (Luke 8:48)‘. For many years, this woman’s identity and her story were tied to her disease, unable to even go to the temple. She was only one thing: the sick bleeding woman. However, that day Jesus called her something else: Daughter. Her Faith not only healed her but also led her to understand that her identity was not that of the sick bleeding woman, but she was a child of the most high God. So if this unnamed woman could write her story, it would go: There is a God who calls me His own.

Hagar’s story starts as a slave, Hannah as a barren woman and the woman with a bleeding disease without an identity. And yet they are the ones we read about today; who give us hope that our stories can change and they can end well. Studying these people’s stories helped me understand how I will tell my own story. That at every stage of life, God stayed Faithful and that the areas that caused me the most pain and shame – stories I wish were never known or told – that is where God started from. He started to mold and like the perfect molder He is, I trust He will make something beautiful out of my life. I will write that: when I was weak, I was made strong; when I was poor, I was made rich – for that is what the Lord has done for me. Therefore, when I tell my story, it will not be from a weak, shameful, and defeated perspective; but it will be full of the times when God came through.

The story I will tell will be of a God who stayed Faithful – even to me.

Jjaaja Nancy – Tale of a hidden figure

Vivian Martha7 Comments

When you go to our village down there in Namawondo, Kibuku district in Uganda, you can stop at the trading center and ask anyone; whether it the village shopkeepers, the chapati* sellers on the roadside, or the boda-boda* men on the stage; for the home of Mzee* Yonah Mbayo, and someone is bound to know the place. “Yes, Mzee Yonah. I know him. He was a good man. Follow this road, turn right at the junction and you will find a muvule tree. That is the home of Mzee Yonah,” they will say while pointing at the road which leads to my grandfather’s compound. That is all they know about this great man who made his home thrive, brought up his children well, and served the village as a Mwami (Local Counsellor 1).  My grandmother Nancy or as we call her Jjaaja Asanasi is only mentioned as one of the many wives Mzee Yonah had.

What many in the village do not know or fully appreciate is the tremendous role Jjaaja Asanasi played in the family. Our grandfather was a great man and we are glad to be part of his family, however I have come to learn that his story and our stories are not complete without Jjaaja Asanasi. Although she lived in a time when women got very little recognition in the community, she lived a life worth celebrating. Like most in her time, she never went to school but somehow had the wisdom to send all her children to school. When Mzee Yonah said he was running low on funds and could only afford to send the boys of the home to school, she dug her back to sickness to raise money in order to take the girls to school so that they too could have a chance at the white man’s education.

One thing that stands out about Jjaaja Asanasi, and which I will always cherish and be grateful for, is her heart. In all my time on earth, I do not think I have met someone with a kinder heart than Jjaaja Asanasi. Jjaaja really took to mind Paul’s exhortation that everything should be done in love and that we should never repay anyone evil for evil. Life with co-wives and overly demanding in-laws is never easy, but if it came to it she would let them eat all the food she dug up from the garden, while always reminding her children (and herself) that tomorrow would take care of itself. When we the close family noticed people were taking advantage of her and manipulating her, we did what we thought was wisdom on our part by warning her against such people. However, her response was always the same, “Leave them. Do not let their bad hearts corrupt you. Do good because that is who you are”.

Jjaaja got saved at a later stage in her life, that is in her 60’s. However, she made up for all the time with God she never had in her youth. She never stopped thanking God for life, for all his goodness, or for saving her. Her last contribution to the body of Christ was approving the construction of a church, called Redeemed church, on a piece of land which she owned. All her savings went to the construction of that church. “Take this. Is it enough to pay for a window in the church? Take this too and send it to the pastor. He may not have food for his family,” she would often direct us, as she handed over a bundle of money from her safe. When there was hesitation from us, she would remind us that God had given her the opportunity to serve Him at her old age and then she would gently urge us to do as she bade us.

In her last days, her health deteriorated greatly and she could not walk on her own. She spent most of her time indoors between the sitting room and bedroom, but she never left her radio behind wherever she went. She always had to tune in and pray along with Pastor Bujingo; not for her health, but for her children and grandchildren. “May Matilda be well, may Innocent do well at work, and may Solomon finish school well and get a job…”, we often heard her mumbling this and so much more.

There is much to say about Jjaaja Asanasi. This is only a sneak peek into the numerous ways she blessed us. She was in many ways a hidden figure, always working selflessly and tirelessly in the background of her children’s and husband’s lives. If our stories are ever written and our lives talked about, I hope it will be remembered that our story, my story started with this phenomenal woman. A woman who lived by one simple principle, “love is the only way”.

Meaning of some local words used in the text:
* Chapati – Chapati is the local name for roti, an unleavened flat bread originating from India
* Boda-boda – In Uganda, boda-bodas are motorcycle taxis which carry one or two passengers
* Mzee – This is a local word used to address an old man. It shows respect and reverence for the old man
* Jjaaja – A local word used for addressing a grandmother or grandfather